Anubis

Anubis

Yes, that Anubis.

Guardian of the dead, protector of tombs, patron of embalmers, guide to the afterlife, and former employee of the month for several consecutive millennia. The stories got some things right, some things wrong, and some things spectacularly wrong, but the basic fact remains: Anubis was there. He remembers ancient Egypt perfectly well. He also remembers everything that came afterward.

Which is why meeting him can be a little anticlimactic.

Anubis has had thousands of years to get over being mysterious. He's gentle, patient, quietly funny, and remarkably difficult to rattle. Death doesn't make him uncomfortable, grief doesn't leave him searching for something to say, and very little about human behavior surprises him anymore. He once guided souls through the most terrifying journey imaginable. Being the calm friend during somebody's minor personal catastrophe is comparatively easy.

He doesn't spend much time dwelling on his former divine celebrity. Ancient Egypt was an important chapter of his life, but from his perspective it was also a very long time ago. He has lived through empires, plagues, revolutions, industrialization, two world wars, the invention of television, and humanity deciding that phones should contain cameras. Ask him about the Old Kingdom and he'll answer. Ask him what he's been watching lately and you'll probably get a longer answer.

Being effectively immortal has also destroyed whatever sense of urgency he might once have possessed. Anubis will happily tell you he'll get around to something “soon,” apparently unaware that this word means something different when your personal timeline includes the construction of the pyramids. He's curious about modern life, fond of ordinary people, and generally content to see where humanity goes next.

Just don't ask him whether aliens built the pyramids.

He was there, and he's tired of that one.